Wabi-Sabi
by alllovelost13
Summary: "Kagome paled. The silvery sharp tip of a sword was inches from her eyes. She sucked in a sharp breath as she realized why it was not embedded in her skull. Blood dripped from his hand and onto the dirt, but as expected Sesshomaru did not seem at all disturbed by it." Kagome and Sesshomaru seek urgent answers to disturbing questions, and... I have no idea yet.
1. Komorebi

**Summary** : "Kagome paled. The silvery sharp tip of a sword was inches from her eyes. She sucked in a sharp breath as she realized why it was not embedded in her skull. Blood dripped from his hand and onto the dirt, but as expected Sesshomaru did not seem at all disturbed by it." Kagome and Sesshomaru seek urgent answers to disturbing questions, and... I have no idea yet.

 **A/N: I have no idea what I'm doing.**

 **Seriously, I just started writing words and this is what happened. I have no idea where I'm gonna go with this or if I will even finish it. Also, it is rated M because there will be very mature themes, maybe. Zoidberg has warned you all! WOO woo-woo woo-woo woo-woo woop!**

 **And if you just went back and reread those last three sentences in his voice, you're the shit. I love you man. Ok- LET'S GO ALREADY!**

 **P.S. Disclaimer: Redundant. Unesseasary.**

 _Chapter One: Komorebi_

Though it _usually_ made her very happy to see the sun shining brightly, today Kagome loathed it with every fiber of her small being. Another droplet of sweat slipped down her forehead and dangled from a dark brow, tickling her eyelid. For what felt like the millionth time that afternoon, she dragged the back of her hand across her face. _Surely_ this was a punishment from the gods for some forgotten sin she had committed - no one should've had to endure such blistering heat. Yet endure it she must if the village were to continue thriving at all.

Usually her work as the villages high priestess was slow, and quiet honestly, boring. Ten years ago, if someone had told her she would miss fighting for her life everyday and sleeping outside every night, Kagome would have laughed in their face. But now... she _ached_ for the adventure and excitation of the old days. Sure, her work here was important- if stagnant- but most of it was meanial or simple, which was best left to one of her students for practice. So any real stimulation was infrequent or absent altogether. Today however, the excitement was ill-gained and superfluous. And _she_ , not a student, was needed. This particular situation urgently required her skill and her vast experience. Simply, no one else had any idea what to do.

Scores of men, women, and children lay on makeshift pallets on the forest floor around her. The injuries ranged from minor gashes, to broken bones, to serious internal bleeding and worse. Due to her futuristic schooling, only Kagome was capable of saving the extreme cases. To top it off, heat sickness jabbed an obnoxious thorn in her side today. She glared in the direction of the bright and happy sun which was heating everything to a scorching temperature - lest it were in the shade of the trees. Luckily, there was a temperate north wind slipping lazily past, keeping the dappled shade of the woods more hospitable.

She looked down and steeled herself for the last major case of the day. Like everyone else in the village, she knew the pitiable man. He was a poor young farmer who had merely been trying to tend his field that morning (like most of the others) when he had been violently struck on the back of the head with the hilt of a fine sword. A pair of young demon nobles had been passing through the little village and apparently decided that destroying Edo would be a marvolus way to ease their boredom. Kagome scowled at the bloody scalp she was inspecting. _Senseless barbarism_ , she thought. It was nauseating.

Gingerly, she placed her palm over the wound and concentrated on finding the extent of the mans injuries. Her inner powers transuded out of her fingertips and flooded the unconscious mans body, causing him to glow a cool, subtle blue. Her eyes closed and she went still for a moment as she examined the farmer. A frown disfigured her lips. His brain was swelling. _Shit_ , Kagome thought. She didn't have enough of her own energy to mend this wound. No, she would be forced to fall back on Plan B. Kagome hated Plan B. Though obviously it was requisite.

A weary sigh pushed its way out of her lungs. If her demonic opponents that morning hadn't been so powerful, she may have had enough of her own strength for this one last paitient. Kagome shook her head and forced her mind back into the present. This man would die if she didn't act quickly.

Carefully, she cracked open the gateway into her soul, and reached inside herself. She reached deep past her own spirit, pulsating faintly from exhaustion, for the near blinding power chained and controlled tightly within her. Ever since she had taken The Jewel inside herself, she had made it a rule never to use it - unless absolutely nessesary. To Kagome, this power was not hers to do with as she pleased. Plan B was only a last resort, and even then only for good causes. Yet silently she always wondered, did she have the right to say what was good?

She released some of her restraints on the Shikon's power and allowed a steady trickle of the potent holy energy to bleed through her fingertips into the battered head of the young man. The soft glow around his body slowly transitioned to a warm dusty pink. Kagome could almost see the injury healing in her mind's eye. His fractured skull fused back together - the dangerous swelling reduced. Then the wound disappeared entirely, leaving only a healthy, sleeping man on the pallet before her.

Kagome sat there for a while, lost in torturous thought. To others, she seemed frozen in meditation, but dark memories robbed her of her sight. To the surface of her thoughts rose things she would rather forget and yet could never fully erase. How had everything turned out so different than she had expected? Why had she expected it to be any other way in the first place? Had she really done the right thing? Did she _really_ make the right choice?

A shiver crawled down her spine like a spider scurrying away from a shoe. Kagome stood slowly and clenched her fist. "Oh please, not right now..."

She always knew he was watching her when she felt that spidery shiver. She groaned and palmed her forehead, letting gravity rake her fingers down across her face with an irritated growl. Exactly _why_ he seemed to take a keen interest in her these past few years was far beyond her reasoning. And Kagome wasn't so sure she wanted to know. While he made good company and intelligent conversation, she was not in the mood for his rude humor and prying questions. Today had not at all gone well in her book, so she wasn't inclined to deal with his subtle games. She desperatly needed to relax. Not only for her sanity but to allow her spirit time to recuperate as well.

Kagome turned to a slight, plain girl who was bent over inspecting a child. "Lady Yukina, please inform Lady Rin that all patients are stable and in no danger. I am going to retire for the evening. She is in charge. Just make sure everyone is comfortable. Oh, and watch temperatures. Don't let anyone get too hot. Keep them in the shade and keep everyone hydrated." After recieveing a nod from the younger priestess, Kagome stooped to gather her things. "And once the sun begins to set, have the rest of the able bodied men move everyone into the temple hall. There should be enough room for them to rest there tonight."

Kagome stood with a weary sigh. She could still feel him nearby. Waiting. "Just ignore him," her feet took her in the direction of her home, just beyond the village. "Just ignore him... maybe he'll go away if I pretend he doesn't exsist."

"You know very well that I can hear everything you say, Kagome."

Kagome stopped her trudge down the dusty path and flopped her head back round. There he was. Following her again. "Oh I was hoping you could."

He raised a slender silver brow. "My, my, lashing out at me already? But I've only just arrived, how could I possibly have offended you in less than a minute?" The handsome face remained still and yet the sarcasm was there, accompained by a slight twinkle in his golden eyes.

Kagome rolled hers and looked forward again, resuming her trudge. Then in a rather acerbic tone she said, "You must be losing your senses my lord, if you cannot observe my own state and that of my village to draw a conclusion. What a pity." She repeatedly sucked in her tounge, and shook her head. "Tsk, tsk, tsk..."

"You realize I could end you right now."

She rolled her eyes again. At this point, she knew all of his threats were empty ones - well, threats aimed at her at least. "Sesshomaru, I am not in the mood today, ok? I'm tired, sore, stinky, and cranky. I have been treating villagers all day, after battling a pair of idiot nobles - your idiot nobles, by the way -"

"Mine?" Sesshomaru's golden glare pierced the back of Kagome's head. She swirled around on the spot.

"Yes, yours. Two young demons - judging by the level of power and state of dress... I think western nobles. If you can't keep your subjects in check Sesshomaru, maybe you should see _them_ more often, and less of _myself_." She turned and began walking again. Then stopped short.

He was in her face. Inches from it. _"Tell me what to do again, and you may regret it, miko."_

Blue eyes clashed with his gold. They stared at each other for a few silent moments, egos refusing to submit. Then Kagome spoke in a low tone laced with ire. "They did it because they were _bored_ , Sesshomaru. Don't tell me you still _condone_ that kind of behavior."

 _Ah_ , she had him there. He did not, in fact, approve of killing in the absence of decent reason. She had every right to reprimand him and he knew it. Though he was _loathe_ to admit it to her out loud, he broke his gaze and looked away. In a soft, low voice he said, "I do not."

Kagome sighed and pushed past the regal demon lord, eager to be home and out of the baking sun. Again, Sesshomaru followed.

"Do you need something Sesshomaru?"

He scoffed. "I do not _need_ anything from you miko. I was simply passing on my patrol and noticed the village was in distress. As we are allies, I wanted to offer my assistance."

 _Oh sure_ , Kagome thought to herself. As if that were his only reason for bugging her. He had other reasons and deep down, she knew it, though she was loathe to admit it to herself. "Well, you're too late, everything is under control and in the hands of my capable students." Enervated and slightly irked, Kagome was _very_ ready for the conversation to turn. "Rin is doing well, by the way- she shows so much potential."

"Excellent. I'm quite proud of her. She was always much more intelligent than other humans."

"But I'm not so sure she is as eager to be a miko as she once was."

"Why do you say that?"

They were nearing Kagome's little abode. Sesshomaru's eyes flit to the gigantic tree off in the distance, then back to the home itself. The ancient well lay just behind her house, covered and rotting from neglect. He knew why she wouldn't maintain it. It was a painful reminder of a now haunting past. Sesshomaru had come to the conclusion that she wanted it to rot and disappear altogether. That Kagome hoped the well ceasing to exist would bring her some kind of closure. But she couldn't bring herself to destroy it with her own two hands, and so it sat rotting. Mocking her.

"I think that is something you should discuss with her yourself." She smiled knowingly at him as they walked. "And before you pry, it is not my place to say. My lips are sealed."

"Hn." He followed Kagome the rest of the way to her home in silence. He did not wish to _truly_ antagonize her.


	2. Nettaiya

_Chapter 2: Nettaiya_

Kagome felt the stress nearly lift off of her feverish shoulders as she sank into her chilled bath. The water seemed to cool her even to the bone, turning her to content human jelly in the wooden tub.

After soaking, she dried and clothed herself in remnants of her past: a tank top and soft linen shorts. Though she wore miko garb when working, the evening was still much too hot for the heavy confining garments and she just wanted to be comfortable. After all, it was her home- she could dress however she liked. Screw etiquitte. Kagome then gathered her long, black hair into a loose damp bun, securing it with an old pair of chopsticks.

Next she grabbed a large bottle of sake and her favorite pipe and walked out onto the porch, plopping down on the cushion next to her uninvited guest. He lay stretched out indolently, his armour, boots, and weapons stacked neatly some few feet away. His own half empty bottle of sake sat next to him and he was lifting a cup to his lips as she poured her own.

Golden eyes fixed themselves on Kagome and slowly took in her state of dress. He found he quite enjoyed the outfit she donned and took another sip. "That clothing is much too revealing for a woman in your position. Perhaps immediate _removal_ of the garments could save your honor?" He was met with silence and a slender index finger telling him to be paiteint. He huffed slightly at her dismissal of the joke but remained quiet.

Kagome downed two cups of sake as quickly as a beached fish gasped for water. " _Ahhh_..."

"Kagome, I think a slower pace-"

"Shhh-shh-shh-shh..." After effectively cutting off his sentence, she produced a small, beautifully embroidered pouch from her shorts pocket. Opening it released a strong acrid scent that tickled the demon's sensitive nose. From the pretty pouch Kagome pulled a small chunk of sparkling, densely clustered green and purple leaves. Then she placed her pipe in between her teeth after packing in her very best batch of taima. Leaning towards the small lamp in front of them she used its flame to light her herb. Puffing deep and quick, she soon had a glowing ember in the pipe, and she leaned back as languid as the demon lord next to her.

She filled her cup again and gave Sesshomaru a cheerful smile. " _There_ , now I can tolerate your filthy jokes. Who knows? Maybe you'll actually make me laugh tonight." She knew him well enough to know sexual innuendo was favored when drinking. This was only a more recent discovery however. Nights similar to this one had become something of a routine ritual between them. He would often stop by unannounced and they would talk until the early hours of morning, drinking sake and telling secrets that neither had any business knowing.

"Really Kagome, only geisha and peasants smoke that foul-smelling plant. I understand it's significance to your human religion, but why do you of all people insist in partaking? There is plenty of sake to be had." The twinkle sparked in his eye again and he leaned forward. "Or _perhaps_ my senses have left me as you suggested, and I am really in the presence of a geisha?" He grinned wolfishly at her, his naturally preadatory gaze tingling her spine. "Shall I bend you over and have my way with you? I pay generously."

"And of course we are back to sex... It took you less than five minutes this time. _Bravo_." Kagome playfully shoved his shoulder as she teased. "Why are men so obsessed with it? Besides fighting and being _The Great and Honorable Sesshomaru_ , it seems to be the only thing you talk about. Besides, I've always been under the impression that _humans_ disgusted you. Of course..." Here she paused, glancing sideways at the demon. "Most great men do tend to screw anything that _moves_." Kagome threw back another shot of sake and inhaled sharply. "Oh what a _glorious_ burn... Anyhow, I have already explained the purpose of my growing taima besides its religious nessessity in this day and age." She paused again and took a long drag on the pipe.

"Ah, of course, it is your 'cure-all' drug. Well the smell can be quite... off-putting." Sesshomaru poured another cup of sake. Though instead of sipping, he threw it back, as Kagome had done.

"Maybe to you, Super Sniffer. It's the one thing that helps me to truly relax at the end of the day. I prefer the side effects of taima over the nausea and headaches that come with the morning after too much sake. And I honestly enjoy the smell myself... I can think of much worse odors."

"Indeed."

A flash of deep red earth entered Kagome's now slightly hazey thoughts. Echoing screams and the pungent sting of unnatural smoke plagued her senses for a moment. She shook her head. More sake washed over the back of her throat. The burn pulled her back to the present.

Kagome looked at the handsome demon, tracing the markings on his face with her gaze. Deep indigo and striking magenta shone almost neon against the alabaster backdrop of his skin. "You know what I think? You..." Thoughts were becoming a little harder to focus with the taima working its magic within her. "...You are the sort of man who tends to dislike something he has never tried, simply because he has never tried it." Sesshomaru's golden eyes flashed at her. "I think..." Here Kagome sat up, and crawled, cat-like, the few feet between them until she was nearly in the demon lord's face, smirking and brandishing her pipe. "... That a man in your position should try everything he can and expand his knowledge of the world... and life's little secrets." They locked eyes again. Though not, for once, in a challenge.

Thus, each became mesmerized in the others gaze. He, drowned in oceans of blue, and she, melted in pools of gold. A rumble of thunder in the distance broke the trance.

Kagome giggled and smiled wide and silly, as if something funny had just occured to her. "Come on, _man_... just take a hit. It'll change your life _duuude_." She laughed, "Come on Sesshomaru, peer pressure... just go with it."

Sesshomaru's brows disappeared in his silver bangs. A slightly bemused expression flit across his countenance. "Peer pressure?"

Kagome giggled again and took another long drag off of the skinny wooden pipe. "Future thing..." She waved her hand flippantly. "But you should try it, it really is amazing." She winked at him.

"If it will stop you badering me, then I will aquiesce. I must confess-"

" _-That my loneliness,_

 _Is killin' me nooooow-_ "

"Miko...?"

"Sorry, sorry." Kagome blushed. "It's a really stupid song actually. But I couldn't help it. Heh heh..." Her outburst cut short, Kagome went silent, except to snicker softly behind her hand.

Sesshomaru sighed, amused. "I _admit_ that I am a bit envious of the... _relaxed_ state taima puts you in..." He emphasized his point by motioning towards Kagome in all her silly glory.

"So you'll smoke with me?"

"I suppose it couldn't hurt..." Sesshomaru noticed that words now seemed harder to find. The sake was working within him already, the alcohol spreading his thoughts farther apart. Sensations lingered too long or came not at all. He reached for the pipe, but held her gaze. Humming her strange tune again, she smiled at him, her small rosy lips tugged up at the corners by her own humor. Her eyelids draped lazily over bloodshot eyes; the intensely blue irises seemed like lightning against their now pinkish canvas. His skin tingled as if he had been struck by a stray bolt. When he took the pipe from her, his long, rough fingers grazed her soft hand and suddenly he felt rather dizzy. But Sesshomaru forgot the sensation almost as soon as he felt it and brought the piece to his thin lips.

"It might burn, and make you cough, but that just means it's good stuff." Kagome sat cross legged in front of him watching cheerfully.

The smoke was hot and thick, but had a pleasant sourness to it. It warmed the back of his throat as he inhaled. As it filled his lungs, Sesshomaru wondered why he had let her talk him into using this. When he exhaled, it seemed to catch in his throat and he nearly choked. He'd be damned if she saw him cough though, so in his effort to hide it, it came out as a mortifying sputter.

Sake abruptly spurt out of Kagome's mouth... all over Sesshomaru's haori. The mess went unnoticed by the woman however, for she was too busy laughing at Sesshomaru.

" _Woman_. You will be _cut off_ if you spit on me again."

"Haha- Oh... ahahaha... I'm so sorry... ahem..." Kagome seemed to compose herself enough to apologize. "I am deeply apologetic my lord." Her face was the perfect picture of remorse, though her tone was mocking.

"See that it doesn't happen again..."

"Yes, my lord..."

Again with the mock tone. He stared at her motionless face. There was a small twitch in her cheek. Then she snorted as her whole face scrunched up again and Kagome howled with laughter.

Sesshomaru ignored her and sat up to take off his sake imbued haori. As it slipped off of his shoulders, silence quickly reigned. He looked at a seemingly dazed Kagome, an eyebrow raised in question.

She jumped when he caught her admiring his chest. "Uh, I... think I'm done. Laughing, I mean. At y-you. Not... of course not... chest... for the sput-sputter... Sorry again." She tore her eyes away from his alabaster skin, her face burning with embarrassment.

"Babbling Miko, there is nothing wrong with admiring perfection."

"HA! _Perfection_! Oh Sesshomaru, forgive me for my rudeness. Of _course_ you're perfect."

He smiled smugly and took another drag off of her pipe.

"And I'm Amaterasu."

He coughed on the smoke this time, his concentration broken by her joke.

"Ha! You are so much fun to fuck with now that I know you won't kill me for it." Kagome wiped a tear from her eye as her laughter died down again.

Sesshomaru glared at her for a moment, but let the comment go. She was right after all. He would never harm her. Much. Well, not intentionally. He took another long drag as the soft patter of summer rain filled the air around them.

"Hey, quit cheifin' on that and pass it!" She leaned over to snatch it away. "Puff, puff, _pass_ , Sesshomaru. Those are the rules." She took a long drag and exhaled.

"I was unaware there were rules for this, Kagome. You neglected to tell me. So it is undoubtedly your fault."

"Touche."

Talking ceased for a while. They sat there, listening to the rain, passing the pipe, and drinking Kagome's sake.

"You know, it's nights like this when I feel closer to home than ever."

"What do you mean?"

"Well, even with all the advances of technology in the future, this is still the same. I can sit on my porch all night listening to the rain... in the company of a dear friend." She sighed and looked down.

"A _dear_ friend am I?" Sesshomaru felt more relaxed and comfortable than he had ever felt in his whole life. Nothing could bother him right now. _Except_...

"Of course you are Sesshomaru. The only one left really..."

 _Pit. Pat._

He looked at the smooth boards under Kagome's feet. Two little droplets of water lay next to each other and his keen nose could smell salt. "Kagome..."

"Don't. Even if _you_ don't think we are friends, don't tell me. Let me have this one connection. _Please_."

"Kagome..." Sesshomaru sat up again and slid closer to her. He placed his finger under her chin, forcing her to look at him. "You are a very dear friend to me." She sniffled. He ran his thumb over her cheek, wiping away any tears. He wanted to see her smile again. He wanted to hear her laugh again.

Kagome stared into Sesshomaru's eyes. Then she managed a soft whisper. "...R-really?"

He remained silent. Staring. Kagome began to feel hot. His stare was so _intense_ , as if he were trying desperatly to hold something back from her. What was he thinking? All she could feel were his hands on her face, which instead of wiping away tears, were gently framing her jaw. Her focus wavered, and her eyes flit to his lips. He had thin, pale lips that were shaped so perfectly they seemed to be sculpted from stone. They were ever so slightly open... and getting closer.

She locked eyes with him again just as the tip of his nose brushed hers. Sesshomaru stopped. How had he gotten so close? He couldn't remember moving. All he could see were her eyes. There was a gravity in those eyes. They pulled him forward against his iron will. His breath caught in his throat. The trust, loneliness, and unabashed hope that shone so nakedly in those blue depths cut him like a hot knife. And he was drawn to her as if he could not survive another moment without...

Their lips touched, softly at first. Both mouths slightly parted. But as soon as they made contact, it was as if electricity ran through them both and the jolt brought them back to life. His hands pulled her face closer. Hers found their way to his chest. Sesshomaru inhaled sharply when her fingers seemed to ignite sparks against his skin. Without even thinking about his actions he moved one of his hands from her face to her waist. The kiss grew feverish. Kagome's hands moved higher until one was pulling his shoulder forward and the other tangled in his hair.

Though her minstrations were pleasing him greatly, through the fog of his clouded thoughts, Sesshomaru suddenly found a single, particular think trying desperatly to stick. Something about... _What am I dogging? No, doing?_ Doing _. What AM I doing?_ And with that Sesshomaru was on his feet, stumbling mind you, much to his own annoyance. Kagome on the other hand, had meanwhile fallen forward without Sesshomaru to lean on and was holding herself up with her hands. A bemused expression sat squarely upon her features, as if she couldn't remember why she was suddenly alone and on the floor. She looked up and blinked.

Kagome was most definately, assuredly, and in absolutely all ways, confused. _Why am I on my hands?_ She looked at the demon lords face to find wide eyes staring down at her, as if he was just as confused as she. "What?-" And then he was gone. Only the faintest of whispering wind an indication he was even there. Kagome looked off into the dark, wet sky and then fell to the floor, passed out drunkenly in a scattered state.


End file.
